Friday, November 19, 2010

Why do I run?

Today I went on my usual lunch run with one of my friends Ronnie, and  he asked me what got me back into running. I thought the answer would be easy- to get in shape, or because I enjoy it. To be honest, yes that is why I started, but to stay devoted and competitive you have to have some other driving force. I started to think about what really is motivating me to push myself to the point where I want to devote all this time and money to doing a half marathon in each state.

The real answer is somewhat complicated that can only be best summed up by this: I'm 26, single, no kids, not a lot of money in the bank, still renting vs. owning, and no dream job as of now (although i am employed and love my employer and co-workers) So what do I really have in my life that is a measure of success? Nothing really. Majority of my friends are engaged, married, or having kids. To top it off, both my older brothers just had their first children within the last 3 months, another reminder of something I want but don't have. At times its downright frustrating because I feel like I have nothing to offer to the table. It would be nice to have someone else say about me "Man, Lisa is so lucky to have...."
So running is my relationship, it is my 'baby' - its what fills that void of not feeling adequate. I do have what it takes to become a great runner again. I'm fortunate enough to have the 'come and go' lifestyle that allows me to devote as much or as little time as needed to train. I have a strong desire to prove my worth- that I AM great at something. I have just enough stubborness to not give up too easily until my goals are reached. I'm young enough to where my body will bounce back, even after the worst aches and pains. But most importantly, for the first time in many years, I have found something that I'm passionate about again. I actually look forward to planning out races and seeing what I'm able to achieve with hard work and time. I finally have that satisfaction of people who are close to me and know about my quest for 50 1/2s in 50 states say "I wish I had your determination to do that..."

For me, running is all about finding my inner athlete that once was alive back in high school. I know shes in there, just have to coax her to start shining once again!
                                                            So...why do you run?

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